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3 Tools to help you Be Your Own Hero

In the Sleekgeek Coaching Program, we use the 3Rs to help our clients get awesome results and I’d like to share them with you too:

  1. Reframing
  2. Refocusing
  3. Resilience

The first thing that you need to know is all 3 of these are skills that can be learned.

Just like playing the piano or learning to speak another language, everyone has the capacity to learn if they practice and work at it.

No matter who you are now or what your past experience has been, you can use these mental skills to be more successful.


1. Reframing:

Whatever you choose to focus on is your “frame”.

Out of everything that you COULD see, your frame is what you CHOOSE to see.

Your frame shapes your attitudes, beliefs, and how you interpret your life. It doesn’t matter what the actual event is, it’s your “story” about the event that matters.

Let’s say you get into a car accident. Your car gets totalled, but thankfully you’re OK – just a bit shaken up.

  • negative frame would interpret this event as a negative event.
    “This sucks! Why do bad things always happen to me? My car is ruined and I’m now late for work!”
  • positive frame would interpret this event as a positive event.
    “Oh my word! I’m so lucky! I can’t believe I survived that accident with barely a scratch. I’m so grateful that I get to live another day and go home to my loved ones again!”

Same person, same car accident. Different frames, different stories about what happened.

This is not necessarily about being an optimist or a pessimist as that’s about hope confidence or doom and despair. Rather, it’s more about focusing on the good rather than the bad. Choosing to look for it. Seeking it out. Framing it.

3 Quick ways you can reframe your perspective:

  • Reframe problems as opportunities. How can you learn and grow from challenges?
  • Reframe “negative” qualities as “superpowers”. Just flip the script (perfectionism is attention to detail, being picky is knowing what you like, daydreaming is creativity, etc).
  • Reframe “I have to…” as “I get to…” (“I have to go to the gym” -> “I get to go to the gym and burn off some stress.”)

How could you reframe the events in your life to help you better achieve your goals?


2. Refocusing

Life is full of distractions, both good and bad.

  • You will get distracted from your goals.
  • Your attention will wander off from time to time.
  • You will face interruptions and a messy imperfect life.

That’s OK. It’s normal.

But if you want the best chance of success then you will need to develop a plan to help you stay focused. Something to keep you hungry for progress.

Maybe you need…

  • Post-it notes with motivations written on them.
  • Reminders on your phone to help you get stuff done.
  • A daily or weekly routine to help you re-focus on your goals.
  • A plan or schedule to follow to help you achieve those goals.
  • An accountability partner to check in on you and make sure that you’re still on track.
  • A back-up plan for when things don’t go according to plan.
  • A way to get quickly back on track and moving forwards again if you slip up.

What do you need to help yourself stay focused?


3. Resilience

You’ve survived every single challenge, struggle, difficulty, problem, or traumatic event that’s happened to you so far.

You’re stronger than you might think.

We all have the power to bounce back from negative events. We’re survivors.

No matter what happens to you, trust that you have the innate ability to survive it and eventually thrive once more.

  • Be open to the idea that you can learn and change and adapt.
  • Be open to the idea that you can handle discomfort and even pain.
  • Be open to the idea that life will never be perfect and you need to keep moving forwards anyways.
  • Be open to the idea that you’re resilient and stronger than you’ll ever know.

How can you be a bit more resilient and “badass” when facing your challenges?

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